Escaping Despair:Moving from Existentialism to a Personal Relationship with Christ

The essence of existentialism is true. We have a sense that we are meant for excellence but we find ourselves with no possible way of acheiving it. Solomon (or the writer of Ecclesiastes) was the father of existentialism. He even passed through the stage where he had given up hope; meaningless, meaningless, and had suggested that we should pursue excellence and to live, despite the hopelessness of our calling. He was able to find few good men and few things worth living for but he said to live, to seek God and follow His commandments is the whole duty of mankind. To strive for excellence even though excellence will always elude our grasp.

So, here we are. The entire Western world is funtionally existentialist even though there aren't many people who even know what that means. We have an entire generation, called X, who have lived their entire lives in a non-stop mid-life crisis. Every generation after them has been stuck in this same paradigm, because there is no hope. They have seen the options fall one by one. Drugs distract from the despair for a time but only add to it in the long run. Pure existentialism uses double-think to convince you that depression/despair are at least acceptable, (if not actually a good thing) even though we know that it is a bad thing. The religious church has taught that the Ten Commandments are still the highest expression of the Christian life, even though Christ has said that the Law brings death over and over and over. Humanism makes the same error of equating lots of microevolution to macro evolution by saying that doing lots of small good deeds will somehow, someday make us good people individually and coorporately.

i have sat in despair. i have realized quickly that "success" will not answer the despair. i have realized over time that my addictions only add to my despair. i know within my deepest parts that i cannot make friends with despair because i was not meant for pain. i was not made to suffer. There is no answer... but one.

The only answer to the internal discord that i feel is time with Christ.

Why? When i am with Him, not only do i feel Excellent, i become Excellent. By His blood and the Holy Spirit (comforter in my despair) i am Holy. Not in theory, but in Truth. With Him (not just in my pocket, but in my life in intimacy) i am strong, wise, humble, bold, full of every good thing. i am beautiful.

Salvation is not enough. Without the relationship, i am just one more moody Christian wishing for death, so that i can go to Heaven.


Hope is not only about the future it is about this moment...
this one...
right..
now.

Becoming Worthy of the Presence

My most consistent reason, whether conscious or not, to avoid the Presence of God is that i don't feel worthy of His Presence and i don't truly believe that i am worthy of His Presence. Today, in the tub, He showed me a picture of a horse. Not jsut any horse. A very honored horse. the horse that He is riding at the Battle of Armegeddon. i realized that i would love to be that horse. That horse is the creature that is nearest Him in His moment of victory. Really, i would love to be any of the creatures or plants etc. that He interacted with when He was on earth. The donkey that He rode into Jerusalem for instance. i realized that before Jesus hopped onto the donkey, it was just a regular donkey. It was His Presence that made it SuperDonkey.

Basic Systematics (ask me about it some time) states that when any two individuals (systems) interact according to a set of rules one of a few things must happen. Either one individual will be changed by the other according to the rules. They would mutually be changed by one another according to the rules. Or the rules must change to accomodate the interraction.

So...
i come into Jesus Presence (because He allows me to)
i am unworthy to come into His Presence.
His Holiness demands the rule that noone unworthy can come into His Presence.

So, his Holiness cannot conform to my unworthiness.
The rule that noone unworthy can come into His Presence cannot change because of His Holiness (ie His character is the rule, when it comes to interactions with Him)

Therefore, my reality, my unworthiness, must conform to His Holiness. The very reality of my unworthiness, or worthiness bows before His Holiness


"Light was unable to become light, until He commanded it to."

Hero

i just saw the movie and i wanted to respond while it is still fresh.

i can honestly say that i have never seen a more beautiful movie. The colors used to code the different stories are magnificent and serve to clearly outline the different stages of the story. The fight is wonderfully combined with the music in a way that is beyond words. Even more that Crouching Tiger, this movie is in line with how things happen in my dreams. It is a true fairytale in this way. i'm not sure if it was on purpose but the Biblical relevance is all over the place. i realize that it is a "zen" movie so watch out for that if you go to see it, but it is still full of true Truth. The scene where Flying Snow fights and kills Broken Sword wrecked me in its revelation. How many times have i asked Christ the question, "Why didn't you block the sword?" and He has answered, "I finally wanted you to believe me." He allowed his love to kill him to prove His love for her. The idea of Word and Sword together is definitely a biblical idea. The Word of God is sharper than a two edged sword. Taking up the Sword of the Spirit which is the Word of God. Jesus on a whte horse with a sword coming out of His mouth to subdue the enemy. Again, don't confuse Zen imitation/deceception with true truth. There is only one Way but He, Jesus, revealed Himself to me through this movie. The idea of the warrior's highest goal being the laying down the sword is also biblical. It explains the seeming paradox of a Warrior God also being the Prince of Peace.

i realize that China has had a long history in which to practice the art, but this movie seems to be a masterful exhibition of the Imperial Chinese propaganda machine, and an interesting primer in the rhetoric of any individual or government (UN are you listening?) who wishes to bring unity to the planet under the power of humanism.

Head into this movie with yours eyes open to its true roots and goals, but head into this movie. The fighting definitely incorporates spiritual elements and it contains the inevitable humanism that is synonymous with Hollywood but the breathtaking beauty and potential for true revelation more than make up for it if you are well guarded.

Three cheers for primary colors!!

Hip hip hoor...

ah forget it.

Owning Kelowna

Its mine. Please don't litter.